Crosbie Matthew

Final Resting Place

Dealing with the loss of a loved one is an extremely challenging and emotional time.

One of the most important decisions is whether to have a burial or cremation, especially if your loved one had not made their wishes known in advance.

With a burial, you have a permanent place to visit and pay your respects in the weeks, months and years ahead.  However, with cremation, you can still identify a place to visit and remember that special person.

Having supported local families for over 80 years, we are well aware that choosing the final resting place for ashes is not an easy decision and certainly not one to be rushed.

Sheila Matthew, Managing Director said, “There is a lot to consider following the weeks and months after the passing of a loved one so it’s not the time to make rash decisions which you might later regret.   Our advice is to take your time and discuss it with your family. You might wish to consider a place where your loved one enjoyed spending time, a place you will be happy to visit in the future, where you can have peace to think your own thoughts and visit on special anniversaries or key dates.”

There are a number of options you may wish to consider and discuss:

Keeping the ashes with you

We receive the ashes back from the crematorium in a green bio-degradable box and can return them to you after the service. There are many options for safeguarding them, from displaying them in an urn to having them placed in a scatter tube for inclusion within jewellery, sculpture or art.

Scattering the ashes

You can also have the ashes scattered in a special place.  Perhaps your loved one enjoyed being near the sea, walking in the mountains or forest or even cheering on their team at the local football ground.   You may also wish to consider a memorial bench or plaque to form a permanent memory.

Alternatively, you may wish to have the ashes scattered within the Gardens of Remembrance of the crematorium you attended. You can also choose to be present with your family or friends when this takes place.   If you scatter the ashes in crematorium gardens outwith Fife, they may make a charge for this.

Bury the ashes in a cemetery

You can inter the ashes in an existing family lair or newly purchased casket lair. There are special sections in most cemeteries that are designated for ashes. These lairs are less expensive than full lairs and allow three casket interments. Fife Council charge a fee to open the lair each time. The ashes can stay in the green biodegradable box provided by the crematorium or you can choose an oak or other bespoke design casket. Some people hold a small service with family, friends and sometimes an officiant present, minister or civil celebrant. Our funeral directors can also conduct a short service for you at an interment of ashes.

Keep them within your garden

If you decide to bury ashes in your garden, consider the type of container so you can take them with you if you move. You can also opt for a moveable feature such as a sundial or bespoke planter.

Taking the ashes abroad

There is no problem with taking the ashes abroad (either all or a small token). We can discuss the paperwork you will require to do this.

Splitting ashes

Some families decide to bury the main part of the ashes and scatter token amounts in significant places. There is no right or wrong decision with this – whatever you are comfortable doing, we will help you.

Something different…

If you would prefer something a little less traditional, ashes can also be incorporated into fireworks, sent into space as a ‘shooting star’ or converted into a memorial tree (Bio Urn).

Whatever you choose, we are here to support you and talk through the options. We can also keep the remains at our funeral homes for up to six months but, after that, we will ask you to collect them until you make a decision.

As restrictions relax, so have rules around funeral services. You can now have a maximum of 50 guests at a service including the immediate family, although Fife crematoriums can only accommodate 40. We can also organise a memorial service within our service rooms in either Kirkcaldy or Glenrothes (accommodating 30 and 60 people respectively).

Crosbie Matthew has funeral homes in Dalgety Bay, Rosyth, Kirkcaldy and Glenrothes.  To get in touch, please visit www.crosbiematthew.co.uk.

ENDS